Philalethistimania: The 2008 Beijing Olympics (or, "YouTube Scandals Waiting to Happen!")

I have been watching the Olympics this week, and rather than discussing the phantastic Phelps phenomenon (see what I did there?), I've decided to talk about some other interesting issues that are abounding around the 'net: dum dum dum....Olympic Scandals!

Yes, even the Olympics have their own either relatively insignificant scandals (you can't tell when she's faking it), or more often than not, the offensively unsportsmanlike (we are Siameeese, if you pleeease...), just plain sick (we are, we are, the Youth of the Nation), or even the disturbing major scandals (Beat The Press).

For now, let's focus a bit on the lighter side of things....

Some of the lighter fare scandals showed up last night when the U.S. ladies of the show-us-what-you-got bodysuits (AKA gymnasts) took on China in the women's team gymnastics. Local (Winchester, MA) native, Alicia Sacramone, totally flubbed both the balance beam and then amazingly also the floor exercise to lose her team all hope of winning the gold medal. Yeah, okay, so they settled for silver, but still, we were right there with the Chinese up until the last event.

So today, Martha Karolyi claims that the event people significantly and deliberately delayed Sacramone's beam performance, throwing her off. Of course, she conveniently forgets that it happened because of a normal "commercial break" that was needed for tv spectators. Um, oops.

And amazingly, just a day before, we hear about how she and her world famous husband, Bela, claim that the Chinese were cheating by having underage girls compete (I *totally* believe that, have you seen them??), and yet that their solution is to have NO age limit for everyone then. Clearly, the Karolyis were smokin' some serious crack in Poland to risk 12-year-old babies in these bone-busting, ligament-tearing, spine-shattering events. And though I agree with their basic idea that the cheating (especially by the notoriously corrupt and, oh yeah, Communist, China) is rampant, but c'mon now!

Almost forgot to mention the best silly scandal with Sacramonte? How about having your own YouTube video of your badass left-hook that knocks a guy unconscious at a party?

OUCH!

And do I have to point out the fact that though Sacramonte is mightily busty for an athelete (yeah, yeah, I can say that...she IS 20 after all!), she is also seriously scarrrrry looking? "Yeah, I'd like a Big Mac, large fries, and...a steroid shake, please."

BEFORE:
Flirty McCutiepie

AFTER:
Thickneck McTerminator

How about those amazingly scandalous pictures of French Olympic swimmer, Laure Manaudou, taken by her ex-boyfriend? You know that's never a good idea (btw, this link is SFW, but the link further down that page to get to the real pics isn't!). Yikes!

"Hmm, I'm an Olympian, so maybe it's okay
if I take skanky nude pictures of myself....

And then there are the surprisingly artistic photos of this year's Paraguayan javelin thrower, Leryn Franco, who moonlights as a model-cum-runner-up Miss Paraguay '06-cum-runner up Miss Bikini Universe '06.

Who knew she could not only huck a javelin, but could also be so darn good at lying around lazily nearly-naked in her off hours?...dang, I'd sooo hate to have her tortured life.

O, wait, I almost forgot about the identical twin synchronized swimmers, Bia and Branca Feres, from Brazil who have an array of professional photos to their credit. And when I say professional, I, of course, mean the oldest profession (ahem).

Ya gotta understand, female teammates who hold and caress each other longingly is one thing (well, actually that's kind of been a dream of mine to watch actually...), but c'mon, taking topless pictures of twins who look like they're about to kiss?? That's just plain ol' incestuous. *Shiver*....

Ohhh, I want to press my soft lips against your...WAIT A MINUTE?!?!

So what do we do about the abounding problems and current scandals? Well, basically, we sweep them all under the carpet and hope they go away (well, maybe all except for the Paraguayan's pics...they were tasteful, after all). Eventually there will be a new scandal breaking, probably tomorrow, so stay tuned faithful readers. :D